Journal Through Explanting
3 Women’s stories of surviving Breast Implant Illness and a 50 page journal.
Releasing into the Universe May 11, 2020 @ 11:11 mt
I had no idea releasing this book would bring up so many emotions.
Today, I am giving myself plenty of space to sit with these emotions, feel them and honor them.
In 1999 when I paid for breast prosthetics I thought I would have big, round beautiful breasts for the rest of my life.
I was 19 and really nieve.
20 years later, my breasts are a beautiful, just in a different way than I had pictured.
Scared, mutilated, and disfigured some may say.
But I am living natural, light and free today.
I have worked tirelessly on this book for the last 5 months.
My goal was to have it out by March, but the Universe thought May 11, 2020 was more fitting.
Most mornings I awoke between 4-5am to make this happen.
Today, I slept in on purpose.
I took time to snuggle my husband and just enjoyed being awake in bed as the sun was peeking its head up for the day.
This book is truly a labor of love.
I am grateful for this space, and the people that supported me on this journey.
Saturday I found myself lying in bed, in tears of fear and feelings of inadequacy and insufficiency.
I had no idea where these tears were coming from until I gave myself room to let the emotions out and explore with breath work.
I found stories from my inner child playing, telling me how I am going to fail, and everyone is going to make fun of me, and laugh at me.
I felt all the people in my life calling each other, saying “Oh My God! Did you see what Jennifer Rollins posted today? She is so ugly and stupid, anyways. She paid for those so she deserves whatever she got. The implants only messed up because she is so stupid and her body is weak”
WOA that is some deep, underlying wicked talk playing deep down.
As I uncovered where these tapes came from I sat with myself and went back to those times and talked with that little girl.
I assured her, she would grow to know so much and to take a deep breath.
I told her that all of the knowledge that is lives within her.
Together we tapped into the great sea of oneness and saw the infinite reality… all truth, lives within.
I reconnected my inner child to her inner power and together we entered back into this reality ready to share our story.
Sunday morning I met a friend for a Pole Yoga session, and just like that the emotional tidal waves subsided, the birds were singing and I found my strength to share this.
This journal is an extension and example of spirit moving within a human.
From ego to dettachement to service, this journal embodies my own spiritual journey/evolution and invites you to come along, and blend our paths on this great awakening.
Journaling has helped me make huge transitions, and having your implants removed especially in 2020 is an intense time ripe for deep, meaningful, long lasting change.
Stepping into who we authentically are is what we are are called to do.
Spirit has created each of every one of us, perfectly capable of thriving in joy on this planet.
We are transitioning into a space where we can more freely embody who we are, and that comes a lot easier when we stop resisiting, and start participating.
I realized that my addictions, alcohol, cocaine, sex, shopping, eating, ect.. they were just tools to keep me from participating in showing up for my souls work.
Yes, they were coping tools I used in those times to get me through, and I am grateful for each one, but they are not the sharpest or most useful tools in my shed, and now that I am grown up, I get the choice to fully choose which tool to use for the day.
Today, I began by reaching for the pole and taking time to center with my breath.
I know that when I begin my day, aligning my spine with the divine, the whole day will flow better.
9 years ago when the story begins in this book I was blessed to have a mentor, Vera Dickson, and the Pole to get me through.
Her words are in this book, so now you have a mentor, too.
The pole is there for you, too.
The practice I talk about in this book is now fully developed and had I kept these toxic bags in, I think I would be dead.
Breast Implant Illness wasn’t a term back then, but that is what I suffered.
My implant was also migrating under my armpit and there was a blood clot growing in one of the pockets.
I actually don’t think I would be dead, I know I would.
Every year women die from the side effects of breast prosthetics, and if this journal helps only one woman, my work here would be worth it.
Included in the journal is a 7 page photo journal.
It is in those 7 pages where I am raw and real with you.
What is that old saying?
A photo is worth a thousand words?
Well, if that’s true, than this little 150 page book holds enough words to fill the cosmos.
If you are still reading this, I’m sharing a virtual hug with you now.
Thank you for reading, and thank you for sharing this book with others you know.
No one knew the pain I was living in until I made the brave and bold choice to have them removed.
If you don’t have implants, but know someone who does, and they have unexplained chronic illness, please pass this book on to them.
You could literally save their life by sharing this information.
I was in such pain and I was so broke (financially and mentally) that sharing my story literally made the surgery happen.
Very few women speak openly about their implants or the uncomfortableness of plastic, toxic bags stuffed inside your body.
If you need your implants removed and cannot afford the surgery or this book, please email me and I will send you a copy, for free. ([email protected])
It is my vision to have a non-profit to help women explant.
If you would like to be involved in that project please message me.
Thank you for reading and sharing.
P.S. If you support this message please become a Patreon or donate to the cause. https://www.patreon.com/polisticplus Helping women through challenging times is my life’s work. Thank you for your support. You are now energetically linked up to sharing and serving in this way, too. The proceeds from the sale of this book will go to sharing it with other women, and a non-profit to help other women explant. Hosting this on the the Polistic Plus site, as Polistic Plus is Pole PLUS a holistic lifestyle. Removing the prosthetics was one step I took to restoring my health back to nature, into harmony.